New Years Goal

1] Do better in school/Get my grades ^!
2] Keep my head in school & out of the gutter
3] Help my mom out more
4] Talk/Hang out with Best friend Jthai more :(
5] Hang out with Ktran more
6] Sleep earlier
7] Don't trust people so easily
8] Take things slow when it comes to boys
9] Do some charity/walk
10] Find someone who can change my life for the better
11] Do better for myself, not someone else
12] LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST & NO REGRETS BABY <3!

ABGLN's Tumblr

“Life changes every minute of every day. You lose friends and you gain friends. You realize your friend wasn’t ever really your friend, and that person you used to hate can make a really good friend. You look for love. You find love and you lose love. You realize all along that you’ve been loved. You laugh, you cry. You laugh so hard that you cry. You do this, you do that. You really wish you hadn’t dont that. You then learn from that and are glad that you did. You have your ups and you have your downs. You see good movies and you see bad movies. You wonder if your life is just one big movie. You look at others and wish you were them. You then realize who they are and are glad that you’re you. You love life and you hate life. In the end, you just find yourself being happy to be living life, no matter what is thrown at you.”

Live & Love

baby there's something about you that drives me insane

i seem to care to much

it hit me like a ton of bricks to my chest
it's something that i never would of guessed
that you would be walking out that door

i'm done with wondering what you're looking for
i tried everything,
but one day you're gonna know the truth
hope that the next one can love you like i do
like i wanted to
yes i tried to love you
oh i tried to forget you

I Thought that you´re the best part of me,
Baby i guess that we just belive what,
We wanna Belive

Still i Cant stop thikin ´bout,
What im doing without,
You on the lonely nights

why would you

Today my head was full of questions... Like today i realized how much my parents fight and for stupid things... My mom never looks happy anymore. Sometimes i wonder whats going on in her head, has she ever thought of a divorce?, and is she just worried about what me & my sister will think?... Sometimes i wonder if she'll ever burst and just open up to me. mhm. So many questions, but i don't wanna ask her... I want her to tell me when she wants to tell me. k'naw mean?

OOOO so today i got a build-a-bear! HELLO KITTY ^___^! She's so cue cue<3.

Oh yea, i watched Sister's Keeper! I kinda cried... I think the fact people were around me... I couldn't cry :/ ! But the couple were sooooo cute :'( WHY DID HE HAVE TO DIE SO FAST! :'/

Oh my lord, avatar was soooo goood D:! It looks like a stupid ass movie... LOL... but it's hella good dude like WOW.

I freaken wanna watch blind side :( but co yoonggg took it >:O! GOD DAYMN IT. I heard its really good! EPPPP. I wanna watch it so badddd!

Dude saw some prettty cute guys today (: ESP when i walked my aunt to something taylor and saw this guy behind me :(! GAHHH. so cue cue... It pissed me off thought because i couldve went to play me some tennis but no i had to go to that daymn boring ass outlet and didn't get anything -____-"! Hopefully i got watch me some CHIPMUNKS sequel tmm ^___^! It best be good. OOO i wanna watch dear john... oh lord :( when is it coming out!??! Hold up my dude, imma watch the trailerrr <3!

It was you, that threw my heart away.

Im sitting here once again just blogging about you.
After all this time i noticed i still can't figure you out... and it seems to be pissing me off now. You are differen't :/... & it makes me mad that i can't have you now... Your like stuck in my head... and i HATE it... I'm like trying to run away & when i can't ... I can't seem to face the facts. It break my heart to know that i'm trying for someone who isn't even there... For someone who's already moved on... What am i gonna do now? ... It's like all this time i found something to smile about... then lost it. Like sand... It slipped out of my palms and i just couldn't grip it.

Today i had a girls night ? sorta. Like a little girls christmas party/ girls night?. It was whatevers. They talked about THE THING... I hate when her name comes up... I just wanna ripe her head off. I had some laughs, and a couple smiles, but no matter how hard to try to think of something else... You popped up. I can't help this, i can't stand this, and i just want to stab myself.

LIKE FUCK MY LIFE TO THE FUCKEN FULLEST. I need to sleep... I don't think i can take this anymore... It's just time to face the music. No matter what i do its gonna always hurt... No matter what i say nothing's gonna change. The best part is school's gonna come soon... & i'll have to see your face... But the worest part is maybe you've... NO you did move on. & you probally have a new chick... :/ ... I wonder how thats gonna go... + THE THING... &'s 22. MY LIFE IS FULL OF JOY...

I talked to Melissa Katherine Le... :'/ I miss her so much. I miss Katie Nguyen too... Mannn i hate this. I HATE MY FUCKEN LIFE. period.

:/ Can you atleast let me explain... Would you let me show you i'm better then that... I just needed time... ugh. This is pointlesss, i'm like talking to myself.

"romeo & juliet, i wanna love you but i just can't seem to do it yet."
daymn that says it all. :'/ WHY CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND?...

JUST LET GO.

This morning i woke up with a heartache

It's about 7:49 and i woke up @ 5... I should be tired... In which i am... but i can't seem to sleep... Sadly i am afraid to... Yesterday was such a heart break, but i need to move on. He doesn't care... like he said he never did then i shouldn't either... But i just can't seem to say i don't care... I know i said i love'd you and ended up telling you i didn't love you yet... I just wish you could understand everything i been through... How much time i need to love you. 4 weeks isn't just enough. You say you love me... but what is love, if you can't even hold on to someone you "love". We all make mistakes and to you my mistakes seemed to hurt more then it should've, which makes no sense to me. This isn't your korean drama's this is reality so open your eyes. I don't know what love is to you... but your love seems to mean nothing to me... Where are you gonna get if you can't even hold on to someone you "love". I don't understand you... It hurts to know i still care so much and i want us to work... but i'm sitting thinking... Whats the point you don't even know where your going with this. I'm so stupid to let you run over me like that. I needa start speaking up. You don't know whats its like to watch your heart break 3 times... and it was my fault to stand there and watch... but i couldn't help it. I'm only human... & its funny how you said i hurt you and your human... thats really funny. What hurt do you feel? I still gave you the time of day. You just dropped me like i was just a toy. Man i don't k now what to do anymore. Just like i told steven... Pick up my heart and move on? Thats all i can do.


&& kenny... i told you, your just my friend. This doesn't mean you need to know everything in my life. So stop trying. Let me live my life. If i don't tell you anything then deal with it @tleast you got the chance you wanted, except it.

everything is just happening to fast, to early... just like before dk walked in... but now i don't have dk to pick me up... The heart ache seems to be coming back. God i need to sleep... I wish i lived next to the beach... I'd sit there until the sun goes down and i'd sit there until the sun goes up... Man i don't know what i want, what i want to do. Stupid boy :( ... He's better at this game then i am. I look so gross... i'm so pale now and i hate it so much... :/ i wish i was tannn like before. I look sick... I hope there's something wrong with me... I just can't live like this anymore... 3 heart breaks in a row... My heart just can't seem to take this aching pain... I just can't watch myself hurt, i don't wanna feel pain.... I sound so emo :/ It sicken's me.

i noticed

That blogging is now my sense of security. Like i barely like to talk to anyone about my problems.... Even though this daymn thing never post my shit. @tleast i let my feelings out. I've been trying to attempt to clean my clothes... and i've finally gotta far enough to say i somewhat cleaned my room ^___^ HAHA.



Today i learned from myself that it isn't about how far you get, its about what you accomplished along the way.



I somewhat got yelled @... because i don't wear al the clothes in my closet... and i have no right to disagree... because i alaways ask my parents for everything and i don't ever appriciate them, like i should... I'm hella spoiled... :( i need to stop.



Steve-o: you did it.



so i said this to dk :

I noticed whenever I try to talk to you either if its some damn thing like this… I can never find the right words to say or what to say. I always have something in mind but then when it comes time to speak out I just freeze up. When I said it seems like you always push me away, I was wrong to say that because I’m the one pushing you away… I’m scared to loose you and I’m just scared period. & the reason I tell you about my past is so that you know who I was and who I still am. I always question you when I shouldn’t, I worry when I shouldn’t, and I always over think when I shouldn’t. I really like you dk… A LOT… but I just don’t think I love you just yet, maybe one day, but not now. I want us to work more then anything… I want you to be the guy that changes my life, I want you to be the guy who proves me wrong, and I want you to be the guy I can say I once fell in love with him. Today I realize everything I’ve been doing wrong, and I’ve been trying so hard to figure out what to do… when really I just need to be myself. I just want you apart of my life, even if you don’t like me and it means all we can be is friends then I’ll just except the way things should be. Your differen’t and I’m not gonna lie. You may not know it but you helped me realized a lot of things I never knew. Lol this sound so stupid… but I just needed to let you know… get things off my chest. I hope you know where I’m coming from… I’m sorry I haven’t been the best “girlfriend” and I haven’t been on my best behavior… but I do want us to work.



i just need to get shit off my chest... Time to be real & not FAKE. like that one bitch -_____-".



well i think thats all for today.... BYE.

Franks small birthday <3 (:

My monkey sense's are tingling

December 12, 2009; Saturday.
"And i love it how you make me smile more and more each day
Baby its you who makes me feel complete
Baby its the simple things, the simple things that you do for me
Baby its the little things that mean something real to me" -JoeyD.

I used to think that all the bs in my life would just keep F****** my head & my life up... :/ ! But then i met you and things gradually started turning around (': ! To tell you the truth i never thought you'd be the one to change the way i see things... But i was wrong. I like you alot... I still can't figure you out... or why i like you... but then it just makes the chase worth it (': ! I'm already worried about you leave for another girl :(... but hopefully you'll always be there at the end of the day.

[ok i wrote this so many times and i kinda give up]

* hopefully this works...
You happened to come at the right time... like a superhero (': ! I just love how i go curious geroge on you & you don't get all pissy, i love how your ALWAYS there for me, and i love the simple things that you do for me. There aren't enough words to explain this... but i'm falling for you more and more each and everyday. You brought back my smile and your just simply amazing baby<3.

I like love you Daniel Keovongsa<3

i like you i like you!

I LIKE DANIEL KEOVONGSA;
(': He's not just some typical boy...
He's more then that, he's like my $UP3RM4N<3