Something old, something new.

September 20, 2009; Sunday.
" I'm scared to LOVE & i just admit it... I just don't want to hurt again"

Hello new day. It's freaken boring... I have school tmm :/... I'm already somewhat sick of it! Yesterday was a boring day too. We had a ceremony of my grandma's death. I ate a shit load :/ ! TSKTSK. So kenny was acting like a little girl yesterday but whatevers its on him not me. I'm sick of having him saying all this shit & letting him say what he wants, and when i'm gone he says sorry. Seriously? GROW THE FUCK UP. I'm sick of feelings sorry for you. I D K about us anymore, and i'm starting to seriously let us slip. Sometimes it pisses me off the most when he thinks he's better then everyone else except jordan because he's just so cool -____-" fucken dumb... But whatever. Anyways, i had this dream last ngiht about this guy :O... i d k who but like it was weird... like i guess we really liked each other and all this stuff... kinda forgot. & then i had a scaryy ass dreamm D:! I was like WTF. School's so tiring.. D: ESP, with tennis until 7 D:! URGGGH. Frank was like you looked better when you had lighter skin D:... wow what a back fire. LOL. oh well. Dude i noticed i think about the past alot now... Like alot now. & like i barely talk to anyone about my feelings now... i'm so closed up :/ but i guess thats just cause i don't want anyone to know? but then again i'm blogging so whatever. I just don't like telling people like face to face or like anything, i just like blogging about it and having people to read it? I just feel so unconnected? Me & beast barely talk now :/ ... but we kick it at lunch? I guess you gain some and you loose some... right?. I'm so tired right now.. D:! Yesterday i was talking to my cousin JBP like about how like she saw this little boy in the corner of her eye when she was getting out of the house & she thinks its my brother... One of my moms miss carried kid. It was weird because when she was telling me and my other cousin's i was like wow... i wonder how my life would be if they were here?... Then for some reason i wanted to cry & i don't know why... I guess it has an effect on me some how? Well yea. I talked to my cousin Alexis, it was funny because she played ghetto tennis @ her app. with her boyfriend haha. Because they don't have a net HAHA! oh well. Man, my family is the closest thing i have right now. Best friend's don't even matter that much anymore. + beast is like family already. EHHH. I noticed i'm loosing my mojo LOL! sounds stupid but so true D:! oh wellz. So big brother jayvee got this dog from his homie, because his homie was moving.. & then he just told me like an hour or so that the dog died ... :'(! RIP; 9/20/09 chico. well thats all for now, adios.
P.S. if there are some stuff that doesn't sound right or complete it's not my fault the stupid thing keeps saying i write something something, so keep that in mind.